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Language Chef

(sous-chef version)

Date:06/02/05
Author:Rune Berge
URL:n/a
Comments:5
Info:http://www.dangermouse.net/esoteric/chef.html
Score: (3.05 in 64 votes)
99 Bottles of Beer brewed on malted barley hops and assorted adjuncts.

By Rune Berge. Written in Chef (http://www.dangermouse.net/esoteric/chef.html). 
This recipe utilizes three sous-chefs to help prepare the barley, hops and adjuncts. Sous-chefs,
however, are notoriously slow working, so be patient and don't give up if it takes a while before
any beer is produced.

Ingredients.
99 kg barley
0 g malt extract
1 kg sugar
111 ml ale yeast
78 ml lager yeast
1 tablespoon mixture
32 ml wild yeasts
10 l water

Method.
Put malt extract into the 2nd mixing bowl.
Mash the barley.	
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.
Serve with hops.
Serve with malted barley.
Boil the malt extract.
Put malt extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Set aside.
Stir until boiled.
Ferment the mixture.
Put ale yeast into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put lager yeast into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wild yeasts into the 1st mixing bowl.
Condition the mixture until fermented.
Add sugar into the 2nd mixing bowl.
Fold malt extract into the 2nd mixing bowl.
Serve with adjuncts.
Put malt extract into the 2nd mixing bowl.
Serve with malted barley.
Put malt extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Serve with hops.
Serve with malted barley.
Put malt extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Mash the barley until mashed.
Pour contents of the 1st mixing bowl into the baking dish.

Serves 1.


Malted barley.

Ingredients.
98 ml lager malt
111 ml pale ale malt
116 ml wheat malt
108 ml rye malt
101 ml victory malt
115 ml Munich malt
102 ml Vienna malt
114 ml Dextrin malt
32 l water
1 kg barley

Method.
Remove barley from the 2nd mixing bowl.
Fold barley into the 2nd mixing bowl.
Clean 1st mixing bowl.
Put Dextrin malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put victory malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put victory malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put lager malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Vienna malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put pale ale malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.
Kiln the barley.
Put Munich malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Set aside.
Dry the barley until kilned.
Put victory malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put rye malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wheat malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wheat malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put pale ale malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put lager malt into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.


Hops.

Ingredients.
10 l water
111 ml Tettnanger
116 ml Spalter
108 ml Hallertauer Mittelfrueh
101 ml Fuggle
110 ml Golding
104 ml Hersbruck
119 ml Styrian
97 ml sugar
32 ml Saaz

Method.
Clean 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Hallertauer Mittelfrueh into the 1st mixing bowl. 
Put Hallertauer Mittelfrueh into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put sugar into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Styrian into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Saaz into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Fuggle into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Hersbruck into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Spalter into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Saaz into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Golding into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Tettnanger into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put Saaz into the 1st mixing bowl.


Adjuncts.

Ingredients.
10 l water
111 ml brown sugar
116 ml corn
101 ml rice
115 ml oats
114 ml apple juice
110 ml black berries
119 ml grape juice
97 ml prune extract
84 ml mango
107 ml red currants
100 ml wild berries
112 ml smashed bananas
105 ml wheat
117 ml rye
32 ml honey

Method.
Clean 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl. 
Put wild berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put black berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put rye into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put brown sugar into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put apple juice into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put prune extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put corn into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wheat into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put oats into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put oats into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put prune extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put smashed bananas into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wild berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put black berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put prune extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put black berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put grape juice into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put brown sugar into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put wild berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put rice into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put black berries into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put brown sugar into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put rice into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put red currants into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put prune extract into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put mango into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put honey into the 1st mixing bowl.
Put water into the 1st mixing bowl.

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Alternative Versions

VersionAuthorDateCommentsRate
standard versionsp3tt05/31/0510

Comments

>>  Stefan Scheler said on 06/02/05 08:39:35

Stefan Scheler "3 auxillary r" <- what's that suppose to mean? looks like something has been cut off. hmm

>>  sp3tt said on 06/02/05 09:55:45

sp3tt I think it is to say recipes.

>>  Rune Berge said on 06/02/05 11:53:43

Rune Berge Yes, it was supposed to be recipes. However, I think it might be better to just call it "Sous-chef version".

>>  Rune Berge said on 12/14/05 23:33:04

Rune Berge This one should definately be categorized as Esoteric...

>>  toss said on 07/09/06 02:55:00

toss Haha very good! :)

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